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funny work sayings 2010 05 26 p9

My father taught me to work; he did not teach me to love it.

If it weren’t for the last minute, nothing would get done.

If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?


We recently received a memo from senior management saying, This is to inform you that a memo will be issued today regarding the subject mentioned above." (Microsoft, Legal Affairs Division)

One day my b

funny work sayings 2010 05 26 p10

Early to bed and early to rise probably indicates unskilled labor.

I like work; it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.


The remaining work to finish in order to reach your goal increases as the deadline approaches.

The trouble with unemployment is that the minute you wake up in the morning you’re on the job.

A bone to the dog is not charity. Charity is the bone shar

funny work sayings 2010 05 26 p11


Doing nothing is very hard to do…you never know when you’re finished.

All I’ve ever wanted was an honest week’s pay for an honest day’s work.



I make a lot of money, but I don’t want to talk about that. I work very hard and I’m worth every cent.

People are still willing to do an honest day’s work. The trouble is they want a week’s pay for it.

God put me on this Earth to accomplis

funny work sayings 2010 05 26 p12



I didn’t have to work till I was three. But after that, I never stopped.

Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down.

If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.

Doing it right is no excuse for not meeting the schedule. No one will believe you solved this problem in one day! We've been working on it for months. Now, go act bus

funny work sayings 2010 05 26 p13


The reason why worry kills more people than work is that more people worry than work.

It’s a biiiig mistake to allow any mechanical object to realize that you are in a hurry.

If hard work were such a wonderful thing, surely the rich would have kept it all to themselves.

Freedom is that instant between when someone tells you to do something and when you decide how to respond.


funny work sayings 2010 05 25 p7


We're not Prince Charles and Princess Di. We don't think of ourselves as royalty. We happen to be working people.


In fifty years, he never worked a day. To him, nine to five was odds on a horse. - Archie Bunker


Doing nothing is very hard to do...you never know when you're finished.
Leslie Nielsen


It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up.

funny work sayings 2010 05 25 p8


Work is the curse of the drinking classes.



I like work; it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.



Let us realize that the privilege to work is a gift, that power to work is a blessing, that love of work is success.
David O. McKay

The harder you work, the harder it is to surrender.
Vince Lombardi


A bum asked me "Give me $10 till payday." I asked "When's pa

funny work sayings 2010 05 25 p9


The reward for work well done is the opportunity to do more.


I make a lot of money, but I don't want to talk about that. I work very hard and I'm worth every cent.

The easiest job in the world has to be coroner. Surgery on dead people. What's the worst thing that could happen? If everything went wrong, maybe you'd get a pulse
Dennis Miller



A good rule of thumb is if you've mad

funny work sayings 2010 05 25 p1


HAM AND EGGS - A day's work for a chicken; A lifetime commitment for a pig.


Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?


The remaining work to finish in order to reach your goal increases as the deadline approaches.


If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the next morning you will have a flat tire.


The trouble with unemployment

funny work sayings 2010 05 25 p2


Conway's Law: In any organization there will always be one person who knows what is going on - This person must be fired.


Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work.

I didn't have to work till I was three. But after that, I never stopped.


Hard work is damn near as overrated as monogamy.


Quotes from a

funny work sayings 2010 05 25 p3



Satisfaction Guaranteed or Double Your Garbage Back.


Whenever you are asked if you can do a job, tell 'em, "Certainly, I can!" Then get busy and find out how to do it.


An ant on the move does more than a dozing ox.


One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important.


I like work: it fascinates me. I can sit and lo

funny work sayings 2010 05 25 p4


Business conventions are important because they demonstrate how many people a company can operate without.


I am a friend of the workingman, I would rather be his friend than be one.

So I was in my car, and I was driving along, and my boss rang up, and he said 'You've been promoted.' And I swerved. And then he rang up a second time and said "You've been promoted again.' And I swerved a


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